Thursdays gym has been and gone, and I’m making a point of posting regardless of the fact that I don’t feel like posting, because there doesn’t seem to be much point. I’ve nothing really to add, nothing was really achieved and in some ways its the lack of achievement which is worth posting about.
A bad thing is happening to my mentality – I’m becoming picky. I’m looking too much for quality and not for quantity. I should be documenting everything and showing all, rather than flipping and fliming and slomo’ing and saving.
quality sucks. I mean quality doesn’t suck, but it does in this instance. Whats the point in documenting progress, if the failing isn’t mixed in the with achievements? It just becomes an ego trip otherwise. I guess I want to be seen as progressing, and if it feels like I’m not, then understandably, I wouldn’t want to put out media that reflects that. But I’ve gotta get over it, no matter how I think it looks to the outside world and my internal conflicts.
This is going to sound like a negative post, but it isn’t, its probably the most enlightening thought I’ve had on my journey since day 1.
So, yeah… expect some new footage soon, and I warn you now, it’ll be shit… but it’ll be real and it’ll be honest and it’ll be where I am right now, and it may not be an improvement on the last video. But it will be here. It has to be. Some day I won’t be doing this, and when that day comes, I want to be able to look back at it all with a beer in my wheelchair and laugh at it all.